Beginning again, again
So. It has been about 4 years since my last post here. I haven't gone back to read through the previous posts yet, I will soon, but right now I just want to make sure I actually write something. I don't want to risk reading and losing the impetus to write.
A lot has happened in those 4 years. Marriage, mortgage, job (can't think of an 'M' word for that). All good things, well not so sure about the mortgage, but having somewhere to live is good. But. Easy in it all to slip into just surviving instead of living. If you let it life will give you plenty to fill every moment that comes so important things, like really living get pushed out.
When we were at university in CU we were told plenty of times that the drop-off rate for actively-involved Christians after university was high, I can't remember the numbers now. But, at the time it sounded crazy-high. A few years out from university life and now, today, I don't think I would find those numbers as hard to believe. Standing there, then, surrounded by roomfulls of active, lifely, on-fire Christians often literally bouncing with life and love for God, for Jesus, it just didn't seem possible that a group of people like that could ever be anything other than active disciples of our God-Rabi.
But life here in the West has way of wearing that away. It is so subtle that it is invisible to anything but hindsight. It is the subtlest corruption of many good things. Things like, marriage, homes and jobs. It happens through the thousand new activities, worries and thought patterns these good things can bring with them. Ten thousand new things to think about, and less time to think at all. And it has worked on me.
Sure, I may still be active in my local church family, serving in the church, more than many, but what we do is not the heart of who we are. Within the confines of my own head, the thoughts, worries and habits of everyday life have pushed out thoughts of God, have become a wall of noise that stops me hearing the still, small voice, stops me from even listening most of the time.
Fortunately for me, marriage has also given me a solution to this. A more audible human voice to remind me who I really should be listening to.
And so I find myself here again. In need of a new start. There are many things to say. Much I have probably learned since I last wrote here. Things that I will perhaps talk through here. But tonight is about beginning again, again. I have needed a new beginning more times than I care to know. Thank God, that God found a way to give me as many as I need. Thank you Jesus.
I'm ready to listen.
A lot has happened in those 4 years. Marriage, mortgage, job (can't think of an 'M' word for that). All good things, well not so sure about the mortgage, but having somewhere to live is good. But. Easy in it all to slip into just surviving instead of living. If you let it life will give you plenty to fill every moment that comes so important things, like really living get pushed out.
When we were at university in CU we were told plenty of times that the drop-off rate for actively-involved Christians after university was high, I can't remember the numbers now. But, at the time it sounded crazy-high. A few years out from university life and now, today, I don't think I would find those numbers as hard to believe. Standing there, then, surrounded by roomfulls of active, lifely, on-fire Christians often literally bouncing with life and love for God, for Jesus, it just didn't seem possible that a group of people like that could ever be anything other than active disciples of our God-Rabi.
But life here in the West has way of wearing that away. It is so subtle that it is invisible to anything but hindsight. It is the subtlest corruption of many good things. Things like, marriage, homes and jobs. It happens through the thousand new activities, worries and thought patterns these good things can bring with them. Ten thousand new things to think about, and less time to think at all. And it has worked on me.
Sure, I may still be active in my local church family, serving in the church, more than many, but what we do is not the heart of who we are. Within the confines of my own head, the thoughts, worries and habits of everyday life have pushed out thoughts of God, have become a wall of noise that stops me hearing the still, small voice, stops me from even listening most of the time.
Fortunately for me, marriage has also given me a solution to this. A more audible human voice to remind me who I really should be listening to.
And so I find myself here again. In need of a new start. There are many things to say. Much I have probably learned since I last wrote here. Things that I will perhaps talk through here. But tonight is about beginning again, again. I have needed a new beginning more times than I care to know. Thank God, that God found a way to give me as many as I need. Thank you Jesus.
I'm ready to listen.
posted by Dannie @ 3:34 PM
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